I'm gonna fail Physics. But I really don't care anymore.
I mean not that I don't care like I'm not gonna do anything about it, I'm just not gonna blame myself for failing it. Even though A-Dy kept on telling me not to worry about it, and that "you WILL pass Liz". Hmmm. There comes a time in our lives when we have to accept failure, and so does rejection. Hmmm. I just remembered something. Last Friday was our last official school day of the second sem. Next week will be our finals week. NOthing much. 3 subjects and that's it for me. For Filipino and English, I have papers to pass lang. In Physics Lab, we had 2 long exams then everything's laba activities. The 3 subjects I have next week are my worst subjects. Math 19, applied calculus chuchu. I loved grade school and high school math. When I was in grade school, I had O's and O stars(more like A and A+).I'm a consistent honor student from grade 1 to 7. HIgh school came, and in my sophomore year, I'm in math A class(advanced math). On my 3rd and 4th year, I'm one of those who scored the highest in tests and final exams. In college? Heck, my past just vanished. We started from scratch, from a clean slate. grade school and highschool didn't matter. Oh well, this is THE REAL WORLD, my dear. I just sucked in every subject. I understand math, but I don't know, maybe my failing is psychological. I mean I do have low grades, but maybe, its because I already convinced myself that I suck in math.Maybe I should change that perspective of mine. Hmmm. 2nd subject is Conceptual Physics. Its supposed to be basic and all, but its more complicated than the usual solving-kind-of Physics.Because when you solve, everything is given to you,all you need is a working equation.If you don't remember or if you don't know how to work it,then sorry. But in Conceptual Physics, you have all the values, but you don't need to solve for anything, you have to find out the explanation for it, the CONCEPT of what happened. Our teacher is not deserving at all to teach at the Ateneo, or in her case, not to teach AT ALL. She could be smart and all, but some great minds are not set for the teaching jobs. I understand it all, fine, but again, I confuse myself with what I already know in Physics and what she taught in school, which is, NOTHING. I didn't learn anything from her, so we had to study by ourselves. ARGH! And last but not the least (hard), Literature Intro to Poetry and Drama. Months ago,he presented to us an alternative syllabus, one that would give us a half-bait education (why so? because he believes that the Ateneo education was long gone, so half-bait education was at least, some education as compared to the fake "ateneo" education we're receiving now). The thing is, it didn't require much pressure of studying and having tests, but, he was just too smart and proud for us. Instead of teaching us the basics, he went straight to the critical thinking and teh college level evaluation of works. How could we actually do that? We don't know where to start. I can't even decipher old english. I understand what they were saying,but what does it mean? "To be or not to be" is quite easy, but then, how will you relate that to Faust, Paradise Lost, or Inferno? Along with 2 school plays, 2 movies, and a lot of poems. He expects us to know it all by heart. How can we know it if we don't know where we're going with all these?Its like commuting. You're given the money and the instruction to go to Manila Bay. Your parents tell you that you should learn about independence and you should think critically. OKEI? that helped! or not! they could've said something like is it south or north? or blah blah hotel is near the bay, or it is along blah blah road. Something like that. He's already telling us what we should look at, or what we should learn from the works, and yet, we haven't really understood the rationale of the study.yes, it is to understand. But understand what?How? Why so? Hmmm...okei.. I have 2 papers due on Monday. 5 other papers due on Wed. Hmm.. I still have to study for Physics which is on Monday 730am. haha!
I'm out!
